Back to work

We made it three days already in our new "normal" life. The worst thing I've forgotten at home so far is my work badge and I just stole Jimmy's that day, so I consider it a win on remembering the 17,001 things that I now have to carry out the door in the morning. Top 4 are all things to do with feeding and changing Charlie.

Wednesday was the day. I remember putting him to bed Tuesday night just so anxious wondering how our morning would go, wondering if he would sleep at all that night and how I would ever leave him. Well guess what?? I tested up but didn't ball my eyes out. Why?? Oh that's because a week ago Wednesday we did our day care trial run and that was when I was a huge freaking mess. Like hysterical-I can't breathe-inconsoleable walking out the door and all the way home. Very happy we did a practice so I could get that out then versus going to work after. It was hard, but I knew it had to be done and he was in good hands. And I knew I would see him over lunch :). Yep, at the time we were looking at day cares I thought I would like him close to work versus home and boy do I ever. Works out nice since Jimmy and I both work at the same place too,

When I got to work, we parked in the parking garage and walked in together- something I hadn't done in a LONG time since Jimmy was super sweet and would drop me off at the door when I was pregnant!!! My desk was decorated and co-workers happy to see me, as I was happy to see them!! Next thing I knew after I got my computer up and running, pumped and had a meeting...it was time to go to see Charlie!!! And best yet, I got to nurse him instead of pumping! Great for me and him. Then it was back to work with a long meeting that afternoon and then pump and time to pick him up!!!

Essentially, the first day flew by!! However, day 2 and 3 were much harder for me. I think doing our morning routine a second and third time made it sink in that this is now our everyday normal and I wouldn't get to spend all day everyday with my Charlie. We went to see him over lunch on Thursday too and I got to nurse him again but Friday I went out to lunch with friends. It was nice but also sad because I wondered what Charlie was doing all day!!!  Turns out...he did great, ate great and napped great.  Overall, they are telling us that they will keep him and he's pretty easy and calm, so that's great!!

A weird thing is his school closes at 4:30 on Friday's, so that means we work early hours on Friday. Which having that extra time at night with our family was great!!! Luckily our bosses are nice and flexible so we can come in early so we can both leave early to pick him up.

I was definitely a planner before but having a baby and working requires oh so much planning at night it's crazy.  I have even started showering at night for a few extra moments of sleep in the morning.

Oh how things change in just a few short days.  I know as Monday is upon us, it will be a lot harder going a full 5 days to work versus just 3...but I know I will live.  And I know that this is the best for our family.  I am happy to be at work.  Really, that's weird, right?  I miss Charlie so much...there's no denying that, but I like my work.  And finally by late Thursday and Friday, it was actually nice to get back into things and start working on some of my contracts that I was when I left in July.   It makes it SO nice that I can drop in and see him whenever and I will, even if I have to ask my mom if she thinks his teachers think I'm a crazy mom.  It also makes it nice that I am really liking the place we chose, his teachers, the owner and the other kids.  Miss Linda is so sweet and I swear, every time I ask her a question about something, she always has an answer and a lot of times it makes my life easier (like how I showed up with 4 bottles the first day of care and she so nicely told me that if I just want to bring frozen breast milk in, they will take care of washing the bottles, etc.  Um - yes please).

Overall...I would say Charlie, Jimmy and I are doing ok with the transition.  Charlie seems to be enjoying it - however he did get his first "cold" I think this weekend.  Was just a bit stuffy on Sunday morning when he woke up - poor guy.  He wasn't his usual self for a few moments during the day, but he was a trooper, took lots of naps, and went straight to bed.  I just love this kid.  Push through those sicknesses, right??  Build up that immune system little man!!!  And I'm happy to say that he is taking a bottle pretty well.  That was one of the main things I was worried about...still working on taking more milk and faster, but gotta start somewhere.

I cannot believe it's already Halloween, Charlie will be 3 months old and November is this week.  Where does the time go?  However, I'm really looking forward to the holidays to spend lots of time with family - especially my little man.

So Monday morning - here we go....

12 weeks have come and gone

Our final full week together.  Cannot believe it has come and gone and mom is headed back to work tomorrow.  So crazy that 12 weeks ago today you came into our lives.  I feel like you were always part of our lives and are wondering what we ever did without your sweet smile every day.  AH!!!  Time flies!

It was another fun week and full of firsts.  On Wednesday you went to day care for the first time and mom lost it.  Hopefully she won't lose it this Wednesday when she has to go into work right after.  You did so good though.  I lost it when I dropped you off thinking you would never forgive me and be so confused when it wasn't my face you woke up to after you took your morning nap.  Well, when I came to pick you up at noon, you were in the bouncer having a fun time and had already had a few diaper changes, taken 2 bottles like a champ, and taken an hour long nap.  Wahoo!  You looked at me and started crying.  Not quite the reaction I was hoping for, but you were so tired because you had so much fun that you went to sleep the minute you got in the car seat.  And then I pretty much stared at you the rest of the day.  I'm nuts.

Other firsts?  Mom went out with her friends on Thursday and you had some father/son time.  Well, I think mom messed up and had an ice cream cone and your tummy was upset...because you cried the whole time.  Mom had fun but was secretly happy that you woke up unexpectedly for a 3am feeding so she could spend time with you since she missed bath time.  Friday night - Grana and Gigi (Jimmy's grandma) were so sweet and came over to watch you.  You did great and they loved hanging out with you.  Pretty sure Grana thought your mom was crazy with the list I left just in case she needed something and at our bed time routine.  Haha.  It's a first kid thing I guess.  However, first babysitter lesson #1.  Make sure you feed them.  Mom and dad totally messed up on this one and they were left with ham and cheese and beer.  They said they didn't mind - but I did!!!  The rehearsal dinner was so fun, but mom's boobs were hurting so bad that she had to drag your dad home to feed you or pump...went a little too long!!!  AH the new normal.

Saturday was Heble and Mac's wedding day...that meant for a long day with Charlie and the Bruns family.  We dropped Jimmy off in the morning at Heble's house to get ready and then we stopped by to see Ashley and Courtney so they could meet you!  You were so fun and liked them a lot.  Then Nana B came over and mom walked through the long list with her (again, thought she was crazy) and then we headed to the church.  Mom and dad had the wedding, went on the party bus and then the reception.  Major pump issues...that's another post!!  But mom will learn, right?

We had a great time, but I missed you so much.  However, I think Nana, Papa B and Aunt Lyndsay had so much fun.  They said when they gave you a bath, they all just sat there and stared at you because you are so cute!  I'm sure they will babysit you many more times!!!!!

Monday...well...that was Monday.  We had a great morning and then the dogs pretty much ruined the afternoon.  UGH!!  Oh well, such is life, right?  Only one more day all to ourselves my little man.  One more day.  I have so much enjoyed these last 12 weeks with you and am so thankful that I got this time off with you.  We have learned so much for each other these last 12 weeks - it's amazing to think back at the first few weeks and how different everything was.  Life feels so much more normal now with you and we love it.  We love you.  So much.  So so much.  Next week's update will be very interesting!!!!

I am gonna miss this

While part of me is anxious to go back to work merely for daily adult interaction, there are just so many things I'm going to miss about not getting to stay at home with my little man. I know the days will be shorter, the schedule will be stricter and the little moments so much more precious.

The big one I will miss is sleeping in and snuggling with Charlie in bed in the mornings...oh yes, with all the digs around us. Our "bad habit" (I say in quotes because I love it...) is Jimmy going to get him if he's crying/fussy around 6am or after, changing his diaper and then bringing him into our room so I can nurse him siting in our bed. My fav. Then I burp him on my chest and he falls asleep. Correction- we fall asleep. It's the most wonderful thing in the world in my opinion right now. There are even sometimes I just lay there awake and stare at his sweet face, still in awe of how just a year ago he didn't exist and now here he is in my arms (and almost 3 months old!!!).

I'm going to miss our random trips to Target, the grocery store and elsewhere. They are so fun just cruising around the two of us. I'm going to miss the days that we have literally nothing at all to do, nowhere to be and can stay in our pjs all day long (especially because Charlie looks so cute in his pjs!).

I will miss watching him play on the floor and in the jumper for hours each day. Listening to his noises and talking back in full conversation like he knows every word I'm saying. I'll miss our walks around the neighborhood where I point out the trees, the leaves, and we strategically avoid walkers with dogs to keep the peace. I'll miss the constant attempt to multi task while holding him. Or being happily interrupted in my task at hand by a sweet baby that has awaken from his nap. I'll miss our support group we have developed of other breastfeeding moms and their sweet babies- that was pretty much the only thing on our schedule each week and we made it 11 out of 12 weeks since Charlie's been alive- so lucky to have those girls and their sweet babies and a great support group.

So there you have it. This was me looking back on the last 12 weeks at all the things I loved and embraced about being a stay at home mom. There is a future that is reality that I'm looking forward to as a working mom and know there will be a whole new list of things I love.

I remember a co-worker of mine saying when I was pregnant that the one thing she hopes for me during my time off is that I treasure the moments with my son and not have a long to do list that I'm wanting to accomplish every day. She said this mainly because I was/am the type of person that likes doing so many things...well...I made one maternity leave to do list and don't think I accomplished but 2 of the things on it. Our house wasnt always clean and the dishes weren't washed and there was always another load of laundry to do and put away. But I didn't care. Why is that? Because I made sure there were times when Charlie fell asleep on me...I fell asleep too and left him on me to soak up as much of him sleeping on me I could get. There were times when a frozen pizza would have to do for dinner because I wanted to play with him a little longer. There were days when I didn't shower because he was having a bad day and I didn't want to put him down.

Good or bad, right or wrong- I can say that I took the time to truly soak up these moments and cherish this time that seems to fly by when he's so little. I dropped my grad school class and am forever thankful I did. I had nothing else on my plate for the last 12 weeks except taking care of my cute little baby boy. And I'm surprised truly at how much I enjoyed it and having no to do lists and just taking in each day one hour at a time.

Wednesday morning at 5:30am- be thinking about me. I will have to get up and get ready for work and be back on a schedule. But for these last 2 days, this mama is soaking up every sweet moment I have.

One of our "stay in PJs all day" days....

Week number 11!

Charlie, I cannot believe that we have already been hanging out together non-stop for 11 weeks.   It seems to keep going faster as the day approaches when I have to go back to work. Oh man.  We have had so much fun I'm telling you.

You get more and more fun each week because you are making so many funny noises now and like to play so much more.  It makes me so happy!!!!  This week was no exception to fun and we are continuing to the make the most of it.  It was very fun because Miss Arden joined in our weekly breastfeeding group!!  So great and love that you already have so many friends!!

This week also was your second road trip!  This time we headed north to Omaha, NE with the whole Carter clan.  All your cousins and aunts and uncles in one hotel...it was so fun!  You seemed to turn a sleeping corner when we were there too and sleep a LOT longer now.  Which is perfect timing for mom to go back to work - you are so tricky!

We just are so obsessed with you and love playing with you and helping you learn new things!!!  Cannot believe you are almost 3 months old - WHOA!!

PS Mom seems to be running behind on blogging because there is so much to do before d-day is here (aka back to work!)

Magic Bullet = amazing

I have had a magic bullet for like 6 years.  I am not going to lie...I have never used it.  Never.  Like I thought it was so cool and then it sat in my cabinet.  I moved it from college to my parents house to my condo back to my parents and now to it's spot in the back of my cabinet in our house.

Guess what?  I have been making smoothies in the morning and decided that I would give it a try because it would be less stuff to clean.  With a baby around, I need less things to clean.

I freaking love this thing.  That's all I have to say.  Here are a few smoothies I have been making in it.

Peanut butter and banana smoothie - 
Vanilla yogurt
Frozen Banana
1/4 cup (around) of peanut butter
Some milk

Strawberry banana smoothie-
Frozen banana 
2 frozen strawberries
One 80 calorie cup of vanilla yogurt
One 80 calorie cup of strawberry yogurt

All you do is put the stuff in and mix.  However...I started to defrost the fruit first because it blended better in the magic bullet and then I through a few ice cubes in and it's delicious!!

Charlie is not a big fan of milk...so I've been avoiding that and just threw in the ice cubes.  Quick, easy and delicious (and healthy) morning treat!!

Ok - that's all.  Just had to say this thing is amazing and I've been missing out for 6 years!!!!!!!!

Week 10 - double digits!

309.  Yep, that's how many pictures/videos that are "new" on my iPhone from just last week.  It's official...I'm a crazy mom that takes way too many pictures of you.  I'm SO happy we got our iPhones when we did because I literally do not know how I would survive or capture so many cutes pictures and videos of you without it.  Especially as I'm getting ready to head back to work - I'm already thinking of the pictures I want to take to put on my desk to stare at all day long!!

I'm not sure what happened to your sleeping - but it's totally regressed.  But we still love you. Even though I don't sleep.  You are worth it, right?

You were seriously SO much more fun this week.  Not that it hasn't been fun hanging with you before...but now you smile, laugh, make noises, look at me and all that fun stuff.  I feel like we are interacting a lot more and it's way fun.  We busted out a new toy this week - the jumper/excersaucer thing.  I just felt like you were getting bored just laying on your back...so I figured I would set it up and give it a whirl.  While you are still not 100% ready for it (your still too short...and head control is decent but it's not perfect!!)...you love it.  Mom is by your side the whole time.  You love the music and you LOVE the hanging monkey.  Not sure what your fascination is with him...but it's pretty funny.  You stare at him.  You smile at him.  And you laugh out loud at him.  Couldn't get enough of it!!

You met LOTS of new people and friends this week.  Your great aunt Pam and uncle Bruce came in town over the weekend from Iowa and you got to spend some time with them.  They loved you and said you were super cute!!!  We also went to watch the KU/KSU game at the Krumholtz's house and Kinley got to meet and hold you...it was good practice for her because she's going to have a little brother in December.  And guess what?  For our final event of the day, you got to also meet your BFF Arden!! We headed out to the Gower's house because Vanessa and Chris and Arden were in town.  The Matlocks came out with Jackson and then Heather and the Hartley's all came also.  It was so fun to have Jackson, Charlie and Arden all together.  Cannot wait until they get older and get to play all together!!!

We are also getting really really good at going places together.  It's fun!!!  So sad that our time together is almost over at home.  It goes like this.  Charlie in the car seat.  Milly and Willy in the kennel.  Lock the doors, strap Charlie in, grab mom's sunglasses and water and head out the door.  Boy our house is sometimes a zoo!!

You continue to grow and be so fun and cute and pretty much I cry thinking about not spending all day with you.  But it's good - for both of us.  You are going to try it out next week and I'm sure you will have lots of fun things to tell us.  Haha!!

There are tons of pictures this week - I had to pick from the 300 or so!!

Chubby baby!! 

Trip to the mall!!

Milly rocking the nap nanny - while the cover is getting washed

DROOL MONSTER

Rocking out on tummy time :)

Lucy!!

Charlie hanging in the crib checking out the mobile

Love this outfit!

Our trip to the plaza 

In his toy for the first time! 

Haha - mom in her hat

BATHTIME - lounging

Kinley and Charlie! 

Bffs nursing our babes!

Heather and Arden :) 

Molly & Charlie; me & Arden!!! 

Vanessa loving on Charlie

Love this picture!!

Another cute one :)

Playing with Bruce & Pam

Uncle Bruce loving on Charlie

Papa Rog with Lani & Lucy!

Nana B and her babies!

Jimmy's find at the Bruns house.  I wore this when I was 8

Lounging outside together

Love this outfit so much - he's growing out of it too fast!

NEW TOY!

Only one full week left with you my sweet babe!!

Oh the fun we have...

So it's easy to take videos...so I do on my phone.  I don't like listening to my voice on them....but what do you do when your 2 month old doesn't talk?  Haha.  Here are a few that I love from the last few weeks...

This one is really long (props to you if you make it the whole thing).  I kept trying to get him to smile and he kind of did!




This one is of him and Jimmy dancing - he was shaking his hips and then got pooped!



Yes, this is what we do.  Oh Charlie - you have taken over our lives for the better.

Week 9 with Charlie Bear

This last week was a good one.  Lots of growing, some shopping, mom got to go out to dinner with her bff for her birthday (and dad did great with Charlie!), we had a fun day off as a family and hit up the pumpkin patch and had our first party since Charlie was born.  AKA we finally deep cleaned our house and it needed it really bad!!!  So much fun with little Charlie bear!

Some other pictures from the week....

Mom on the treadmill...baby asleep...#goawaypregnancyweight

Scratching his head thinking while hanging on the mamaroo

WHAT is my hand doing??

Bumbo time!!  Holding on to mom for help!

Snuggle time with dad on his day off!

Breakfast at a Mexican place??

YUM - Charlie likes it

Check out my sweet shoes!!  (thanks Aunt Lauren)

HEY cutie pie!!

Chilling watching some football....

Monday morning walk with mom on a chilly morning

Headed to get our shots :(

The shots...so sad....but it's ok because there was lots of mama snuggle time during the day!

Willy wanted to make sure he was OK too

Another fun week in the books - more to come with our little man!!!!