Monday, March 29, 2010

The last "fancy" single date & veto power

Wedding stuff has obviously been consuming my life, but the past few week (especially with KU out of the tournament) it has been consuming Jimmy's as well. He has proved to be quite the handy man, napkin stamper and seating expert! This weekend alone he stamped 400 napkins (to add to my 400) on Friday night, got the materials and built the photo booth background on Saturday, and also did the entire 280 person seating chart for the reception. He sure earned his keep this weekend :) However, being a man, he needed a break apparently. So that meant we were heading to Capital Grille on Saturday night for our "last fancy date as single people" dinner. Thanks to his parents, we had a nice little gift certificate, and after we watched K-State basketball loss :( we were off to the plaza all dolled up like it was our first date (well, not really).

It turned out to be quite the evening!! I think I forgot was it was like to go on a date with your signifcanct other alone, with no purpose except to spend time together. So we ordered an appetizer and some entree's: Steak for him, salmon for me (we had lunch @ BRGR that day at like 3:00, so unfortunately I was not able to stomach more red meat) and then some delcious sides of mushrooms and asparagus. The BEST part of the whole night was when the waiter asked, "would you like dessert?". I know the usual answer to this, it's "no" because Jimmy is not a big dessert guy and I refuse to order it and "split" it with him and then I end up eating the entire me, it's happened many times. Jimmy said "YES, we'll take a look at the dessert menu". Wait- WHAT?! Um, SCORE! Luckily I didn't finish my whole meal because I had plenty of room left for dessert. We settled on cheesecake with berries. And oh my gosh, it was literally heaven. The best part was is that the chef had carmalized some sugar and put that hard "crust" on top of the cheesecake (think Creme bru le). So when you stuck your fork in it you had to break the top a little bit...and then when you ate it, well that was just like pure heaven. A little bit of crunchy, mixed with smooth & delicious cheesecake, topped off with a graham cracker crust---then throw in some fresh fruit! Wow...I'm salivating thinking about it right now.

But then I also go some coffee to go with the dessert and Jimmy acted like a "man" and got some $11 straight alcohol drink for his after dinner drink (I will not comment on this one, since he was paying) and we just sat there and talked while enjoying our delicious dessert. I literally told him how much fun I forgot we had together not talking about wedding stuff :)

Then I dropped the bomb. Let me interject really fast and give you my over-arching wedding planning thoughts and higharchy:

- Bride makes the final decision
- Mom, MIL, sister, aunt, dad, etc can make suggestions, give ideas, etc (and they have had some GREAT ones!!!!) but overall, bride say yes or no, especially if bride is footing the bill
- Groom may have lots of opinions, but if groom knows it's something that bride really cares about or put a lot of time and effort in to, it would be best if groom didn't comment
- Bride has final approval--- meaning overall veto power

Ok, so now that you know my thinking..back to the story. And please understand, I'm not trying to be Bridezilla or mean or rude or make anyone think that I know everything....because believe me, I do not and I often times don't have the greatest ideas and I'm thankful for the support in my family & friends that I've had to give me some awesome ideas and help me make them a reality!! However, when it comes down to the final decision, if I really don't like it or have a bad feeling about it, I think that it's ok if I say no. Don't you??!!

So after 11 months of wedding planning and lots of compromise, open discussions, throwing around ideas and executing them...I put my first veto. And let me tell you, I was very hestitant about it because I knew this was something we had talked about for a long time.

So with his $11 strong drink in hand, I looked Jimmy in the eye and told him, "I'm going to veto karaoke at our wedding."

I let it sit for a bit, took a drink of coffee and turned back to see his reaction. "That's fine babe, honestly, if you don't think it's going to work, then let's not do it"

Um, ok. Not the response I was expecting! In fact, I had several "whys" to give to him, as justification for my overarching stretch of bride power that I just exercised. They were:

- This is the one thing that when I think about the entire day, I get really stressed out about. I would like to eliminate that. I just for some reason cannot see how it will all play out in my head...probably because I've never seen it done before at a I can't envision how it will happen!
- It can go either way with our guests: be a big hit or be a huge disaster. If it's a huge disaster, I'm not willing to risk all the time/effort/stress/tears/money I spent over the last year and have our guests leave with a bad memory in their heads because a too-drunk guest wouldn't get down from singing "Thunder Road" & "Betty's got a gun" over and over again.
- I think we will want to keep dancing and having a great time until we leave!!
- And I think that's it. Oh, and I promise to take you (jimmy) out to karaoke the Saturday we get back from our honeymoon, which happens to be Jimmy's 26th birthday, to make up for my veto

He laughed, swigged his expensive cocktail, gave me a "eh, I think I might puke" face because it was probably a bit strong, and then finally swallowed the liquor (thank god!) and smiled. He then told me that I'm the boss, he completely agrees about the "last memory" and wants our guests to leave thinking what a great time they had also, so let's skip the karaoke and dance the night away, no big deal to him.

Done. And that's the final say folks. While I do think karaoke would provide for a very fun time, I think we are going to stick to heading out to the WestPort Flea Market to hit that scene up and let the dancing continue all night long on April 10!!!!!!!

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