Thursday, September 3, 2009

On this Thursday....

So because the "On this Wednesday...." post was well received with the random thoughts, I have decided to do one every week, but different/random new theme each week. No set day (I'm not sure if I could handle a "deadline" on a blog), but I promise there will be one each week.

Today's theme is...

Things that make for AWKWARD situations...
**Feel free to add yours as a comment because I know as you read this you will have like 7 pop in your head. And I want to hear about them, just as much as you want to tell about them!!
Public restrooms: REALLY think about the concept of them. You go into one, sometimes make eye contact with a person also on their way in, walk into an area surrounded by not-so-sturdy walls, pull your pants down and do your business while listening to other people do theirs. For guys- I feel like it's even more awkward. There is the potential for someone else to see your THANG. Weird. Public restrooms have to exist (obviously) and I use them all the time- but still.
Walking past the same person in the hallway at work/your apt building/on the street/anywhere at least once a week, making eye contact, but no head nod, friendly smile, HI. Just a stare back and forth. never knowing their name, what they do, or what their teeth look like, but you are both ok with it- really weird.
Walking past someone in the hallway at work/your apt building/on the street/anywhere that you know, smiling as you approach them---to either A) Realize that you don't and you look like an idiot smiling at them or B) Realize that they have no clue who you are and give you a "stop smiling at me" rude look as they pass
Trying on wedding dresses. Anything that involves stripping down to your undies in front of a random wedding dress "consultant" is awkward. Not to mention that no matter what their response is "OMG- you look awesome", even if it's 8 sizes too big, with huge ruffles, and beads everywhere. For that they receive my awkward smile and slight hand wave in return.
Opening presents in front of the gift giver(s). While this might not be on your list, it's totally on mine. My facial expressions are absolutely transparent. Like I cannot even pretend. And when I open presents that I actually do love and swoon and smile- for some reason I still feel like the gift giver is looking at me saying "come on- give me more excitement, that's my $$ I spent". It's a personality flaw. However, with our upcoming nuptials I'm going to have to find a way to overcome this- because I promise you....I do like the gift you just gave me!!! I just really suck at making that apparent at the time. Jimmy can confirm this for you. The first 3 out of 4 pieces of jewelry that he bought me- awful experience for both of us.
Door to door salesmen. "Knock knock---Hi I'm a complete stranger that is going to try and sell you something that you obviously don't need, but I want to come inside to your house and try to convince you anyways. Which at that point if I do attempt to murder you- you are the idiot that let a complete stranger into your house because you feel bad because it's 100 degrees outside and you felt as if you had no other choice but to let me in your house and let me waste 15 minutes (at least) of your time trying to sell you something". But what are you supposed to do? Let them die of heat exhaustion- guess so. You could slam the door also and completely avoid it to. Hmmm.....
Looking down and realizing- mid conversation- that your fly is unzipped. What do you do? Can't just stop and zip it up in front of the person- but when you glanced down and glanced up with a look of panic, that person followed your eyes and now is also fully aware that its down----but yet to avoid a somewhat ever more awkward scenario you continue on talking acting like nothing happened.
Your dog is pooping in someone else's yard right as they come outside. Even though you have the little plastic bag to pick up the poop in their yard- waving to the owner as they pull out of their driveway and scoff at your dog- who still has their back arched 100% doing the deed- totally awkward.

Now of course most of these are from personal experiences and fit into my definition of "awkward" and it kind of made me cringe typing this and rehashing them. But oh so fun. Enjoy!! Getting excited for a LONG weekend!!


  1. Its true, the only jewlery I bought you that you liked the first time and kept and didn't take back or make a bad comment about was the engagement ring. At least I got the most important one right!

  2. The dog pooping one especially!!! Even worse- if you don't have a bag!

    What about when it is "that time on the month" and having to take your purse with you to the bathroom- dead give away to everyone else that it's that time. hate this.