Now this isn't just any anniversary- today marks the day that my parents were married THIRTY years ago. Amazing if you ask me. May 30, 1980 in Baldwin City, KS, my parents had their wedding- complete with cake, mints and punch and a party in the church basement. It was really fun planning our wedding when my mom would throw in comments about her own---because obviously I wasn't there to see it for myself, but it's crazy to me how weddings have changed from 30 years ago and all the extras that are almost "expected" now. It's nice to think back to when my parents got married (maybe around the same time as yours?) and how they just had a simple ceremony celebrating their marriage and look at where they are now!
To me, the story of how they met is really neat, so I figured, why not share it with the world? (sorry mom, you don't have a problem with a little invasion of privacy, right?) They met at Baker University in Baldwin, KS I think in 1978 or 1979. My mom was an admissions counselor at the college and my dad was the assistant basketball coach and a student there(he was one of those with a 6+ year college plan :) love him!). I cannot remember exactly how they ended up officially meeting, but I do know they have both told me they saw each other prior to their formal introduction and the other one caught they eye. But a long story short, they met, dated, fell in love, families met, love deepened and then my dad drove my mom up to Storm Lake, IA (his home town) and took her to the bank. There he got an engagement ring that he had (yes, from a previous proposal) in a safety deposit box, drove my mom to the side of the lake and while in the car, asked her to marry him. From what my mom and dad have both told us over they years, I feel like the conversation/proposal went a little like this....all speculation of course, since I wasn't even a thought in anyone's mind at the time.
They look like kids here :) So funny!
Dad: So I'm going to work at a camp in North Carolina this summer, which you know. And I'd love if you married me and came with me!
Mom: I would love to marry you! The camp thing doesn't sound super fun, but I'll go along for the ride.
Dad: Great! Love you! I'm so lucky.
Mom: Ok, lets get married in 6 weeks, so we can get this show on the road.
On their wedding day: May 30, 1980- yellow hat and all!
And, they did. My mom even moved houses the morning of her wedding (talk about stressful), but they wedding was a success, woman's hats and all! Then they road tripped to North Carolina that summer together, stopping at Tan-Tar-A on the way for a short honeymoon. Half way through the summer, my dad got mad at the owner because she was making him drive a bus full of kids that had faulty brakes, so they left and went back to Kansas. They lived in the boys dorm together as their first place, where there were apparently several nights when the basketball boys came home a little too toasty and were a little too loud that my dad got up in the middle of the night to yell at them and he forgot he wasn't wearing any clothes. Oops! Bet that shut them up really fast. Another kid threatened my dad saying that he was going to tell the dean on him because he knows he has a lady staying there with him because she comes in every Friday with her suitcase and then leaves again on Monday with a suitcase (which would have been my mom, traveling as an admissions rep, living in the dorm parent apartment, with her husband. the dean attended their wedding). Oh the stories could go on and on :)
So sometime in their first 1-2 years of marriage, my dad graduated from college and got offered a job with the YMCA in Victoria, Texas. While he was taking my mom down to see the town where they'd be living if he accepted the job, he tells my mom --- while riding in a small propeller plane --- that he actually DID already accept the job and they would be moving. Needless to say, I think there was a small argument that followed, considering such a big decision was made without her input, but she still moved, quit her job, found a new one, and started a new life in Texas with him. The next few years they spent in Texas, I'm not quite sure exactly the timeline of events, but I know they moved some, but eventually ended up in Houston. My mom got her masters there and worked at the University of Houston and maybe the University of Texas, as Houston, too (sorry if I'm WAY off). My dad also started teaching and worked downtown Houston- in which he did not know how to correctly pronounce any of his Hispanic students named spelled J-E-S-U-S. Now, that's a funny story. Of course in the mean time, family drama on my mom's side took place- which made for some funny stories, they got 2 wiener dogs (duh), Hondo and Sammy, bought a house and after 5 years of marriage and at the age of 29, my mom got pregnant. Yep that is right, with me! We tend to do things 30 years apart. Born 30 years apart (she was 30 when I was born) and get married 30 years apart :)
SOO CUTE! I love this picture!
Does this picture look familiar?? With one dog more? :)
Many funny pictures later, I was born and spent 2 years as a Texas girl. Running around with all the boys in the neighborhood while they convinced me that dog poop was really a tootsie roll, and you can guess what happened next (aka every mom's nightmare). Then my mom interview for a job as a high school counselor at Park Hill high school, in North Kansas City, and in 1987, our family relocated there (sans dogs---who apparently were taken to the "wiener dog farm" which I'm still in denial about, but apparently Hondo was misbehaved. But Sammy passed away). I obviously do not remember this. But then we moved to Shawnee, my mom got pregnant again with my little sis, Lyndsay, and my dad was teaching at Desoto (still does) and taking masters classes at KU.
Lyndsay was about a month old!!
After 2 kids, their traveling around, moving from place to place (and probably overall social life) slowed down...as we stayed in Shawnee until I was in 2nd grade and then we moved to where my parents live now, in a neighboring suburb. Just because their moving locations slowed down, it seemed that life picked up as we were growing up and getting involved in activities, had friends, etc that they were constantly carting us around, coaching us, feeding us, and being just overall wonderful parents. Hopefully I didn't butcher their "love story", as I like to call it, but that's the best my memory serves me.
Now, as someone who is recently married, when you think back to your life as a young kid, I now have SO much respect for my parents and all they did for my sister and I....and really am just amazed they did it all and did it so well in my mind. Right now Jimmy and I are trying to figure out how to run our household together, figure out our budget, get the grass mowed, house cleaned, work out regularly, work full time....AND find time to spend with our family and friends. I'm sure things get "easier" with time, but we even have fights now about stupid stuff and he makes me want to scream on a regular basis- add in 2 young kids, one person getting their masters and coaching, 2 full time jobs...and I can't imagine the arguments, scuffles, and frustration. But you know what, as sure as I am that those went on between them, we never saw it. Yeah, I'm sure we could tell when they were mad at each other, but we never saw them fight in front of us as kids. And doesn't that make you just have more respect for your parents when you are older and can realize how life can get the best of you sometimes and sometimes words just come out, emotions just get the best of you...and you might say things to someone that you don't mean...but they kept it between each other. And worked it out with each other. Because they loved each other enough then to know they could work it out and that it was worth it. A love like that, I strive for in my marriage in the years to come. That no matter how frustrated you get, no matter what the situation presents itself and no matter how mad you might be at that person, you still love them and you take the time and effort to work it out with each other. For you. For your family. For each other. Pretty powerful. But that's what true love is, it's so powerful that I truly believe it can overcome anything.
Then came all the years of us growing up as kids and hating them, hating each other (Lyndsay and I), being teenagers and getting our hearts broken by friends and boyfriends. They stuck with us through it all as parents, and continued to love each other along the way. My dad would buy my mom lavish gifts and she would get mad because he spent too much money (hm, maybe that's where I get it from? haha), but she liked them I know deep down (I know I do!). The little hugs, the support, the sarcasm, the arguments, the eye rolling....I could see it all now as an older kid. It showed me that marriage could be playful and fun, and there will be times you think that person is annoying, but deep down you love them. And then there are the times of sorrow...someone gets sick and has to go into the hospital. The support they give each other, those late nights and many trips to the hospital they make for each other. Medication reminders, reminders to "slow down!!" because you're going to make yourself sick again. Then you have the loss of friends and family, the way they reach out to each other that my sister and I can't see, but we know it's there. Those are just the little things that happened over the course of their long marriage and still occur today.
Since I cannot be with them today and help them celebrate, I want to just honor them and their love for each other these past 30 years, and thank them for such a wonderful example of marriage - the ups and downs - that they have given to me, in which I can draw from during my own marriage. In our wedding, the priest listed off the fabulous examples of long lasting marriages we have in our legacy, which include all our grandparents at 50+ years, his parents at 30+ years and my parents at 30 now...and he is so right, what an amazing legacy. So to my mom and dad on their 30th anniversary, thank you for the example you have given Lyndsay and I, the love and support you have shown us over the years, and mostly, the love and support you have given to each other, your marriage, and our family through rich and poor times, in sickness and in health, for better or worse....all the days of your life.
Parents and girls with the dogs :)
The growing family...
It's official- it's Jimmy Bruns. Haha. Just kidding.
Cheers to my mom and dad, here's to another 30 years full of love, happiness, and a growing family!!! :)
At our wedding in the photo booth- 30 years after their own!
We love you!
Love~ Brittany, Jimmy and Lyndsay